As a homeschool graduate myself, I was quite interested in the documentary “Homeschool Dropouts: Why the second generation is now headed for a spiritual wasteland“. This whole topic strikes a chord in me, since I am the only individual my age (as far as I know) in my city of 27,000 who was home educated, and I could count on one hand the number of young women I know who even claim to be Christians. What is sad is that most of the friends I had growing up have either moved away or dumped Christianity, leaving this area a true spiritual wasteland. In my travels I have worked and lived with many homeschooled youth, however, I have met very few second generation homeschoolers who intend to passionately raise up their own children to follow the Lord. Ten or fifteen years ago I would have laughed in disbelief if anyone would have suggested that the number of my Christian friends would actually decrease as I got older. Yet, that is actually what has happened. The falling away of many of my friends has been heart-breaking.
Watch the trailer for this DVD at the bottom of this page.
This documentary by the Botkin children explores some of the reasons why second-generation homeschoolers are dropping out of the movement – in other words, they don’t intend to homeschool or actively disciple their own children (and many are dumping Christianity altogether). The labor of their parents means nothing to them. They try to melt back in to mainstream American culture, thinking it will bring them happiness. As one of the Botkin children puts it, “They want to be cool.”
Each of the Botkin children shares insights into the problems of their own generation of homeschooled youth. It is a generation that has been given much – the most parental attention, excellent education, and protection from a decadent society. However, six sins are sabotaging this generation of homeschoolers:
1. We don’t seek God for ourselves. (Please read that about ten times!!!!!)
2. We don’t take our own sin seriously.
3. We are proud. (Homeschoolers may be academically better than average, but “Is beating the average really a standard of success?”)
4. We don’t engage the world. (Isolating ourselves from the world’s problems instead of confronting them.)
5. Laziness and complacency.
6. We are bitter instead of grateful.
The Botkin siblings interview several homeschool graduates in this video, including the first Japanese homeschool graduate. They are very insightful in analyzing the strengths and weaknesses of today’s homeschool movement and give a basic blueprint for what we really need to do to move forward.
I am going to add some of my own insights here. The DVD doesn’t go into depth on the following issues, but I felt I could not address this topic without mentioning these things:
1. Conflict among homeschooling families: This is the elephant in the room that no one wants to deal with. American individualism is partly to blame for this; Americans generally don’t see why they should change their ways in order to get along with someone else. In my area, many homeschooling families are separatist and anti-government and just aren’t interested in forming strong friendships with other families. We need to do a much better job of getting along with each other.
2. A low view of marriage: I couldn’t even begin to count all the derogatory statements about marriage I have heard in homeschooling circles. I haven’t met many who are intentional about establishing a Godly marriage and family.
3. Luxurious, self-centered living. While homeschooled kids probably do more chores than their peers, I have been concerned that many of them aren’t prepared to do anything hard. I am shocked at the self-centered thinking I have encountered among homeschoolers. Some parents have gone beyond their responsibility to protect their children from bad influences and are trying to protect their children from anything hard whatsoever, including hard work. I have been surprised and saddened that many homeschooled youth won’t reach out to serve and help others because of the “danger” involved. I am thankful that my parents allowed and encouraged me to sacrificially serve other people.
4. Hypocrisy and legalism. We have all seen it; for example, a mom who wears skirts every day but doesn’t see anything wrong with yelling at her husband, or the daughter who is proud of her purity ring but doesn’t see anything wrong with vilifying a friend behind her back. I could fill a book with the things I have seen, but I would rather put those things behind my back. I have learned a lot of lessons. The solution to these twin problems is the reverse of #1 of the Botkins’ list of sins: We need to seek God for ourselves. We need to stop seeking to be more “righteous” than our neighbor; we need to humble ourselves and admit we need Christ’s righteousness.
I would highly recommend this DVD for anyone who would be interested in an insider critique of the homeschooling movement; you can get it here. It’s also useful for those of us homeschool graduates who are confused and disheartened by the negative attitudes of our homeschooled peers as the Botkins do a good job of outlining the major issues at stake. For those of you who weren’t homeschooled are haven’t had much contact with homeschooling, the issues described in this DVD are widely applicable to our entire generation of Christian youth: a generation that has, for the most part, dumped the faith of their parents. Those of us who know the Lord need to take very seriously the responsibility we have to pass on the faith to the next generation – nobody else is going to do it for us.
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December 22nd, 2009 - 7:57 am
Thank you for sharing. My husband will not let me homeschool at this time. So my two youngest are in Christian school. I see each of their personalities are so different and i know one does not care much for the things of God. I’ve tried to prod, suggest, push, lay off– but I have given it over to God and , like you said, He must seek God for himself- I can’t make him. It makes me sad, but it is good to learn to give control over to God.
Blessings, Chanin
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December 22nd, 2009 - 5:34 pm
I am so speechless, I am not even sure I know how I feel. So many questions right now flying through my spirit.
Some of what you say I KNOW is true and the rest I am just not sure. Not sure in that I need to process it, it seems so scary to me.
I have gotten past the gotta wear this or that and have begun the journey of simply wanting to look like Him who saved me. Col 3
I realize that just because we homeschool doesn’t mean we are better. Actually I have many fears that I am just putting on a show of home schooling and I am not doing the job I should. The greater fear is that everyone knows it.
My fear is that we my husband and I are not really preparing our children for what is to come in these last days. Are they going to sit down or stand up when the LORD says its time move out. Are they going to begin the journey of seeking Christ for themselves for the power of daily salvation. Thank you for your post above I will read it several more times.
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December 23rd, 2009 - 8:40 am
Wow…
I have done a mix of home & public & hadn’t even thought about some of the things pointed out. It seemed to me that A) teaching isn’t my gifting, so I had to rely so heavy on the Lord and my children to “teach me how to teach.” But — I didn’t have all the resources to give my special needs child what was needed to teach — so we were thrust into an area of relying on the “system” we hate so much — which taught us to be an influence, not a doormat….
The points being discussed hurt, can even hinder, but in all things, help us… because pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before the fall.
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December 26th, 2009 - 1:22 am
Thank you for your replies and for sharing your own struggles as mothers. I was afraid I would get blasted by bitter ex-homeschoolers for being supportive of homeschooling – it’s happened before. I appreciate the fact that each of you care about your children and are intentional about raising them up for the Lord. That’s something we don’t see often. We have huge challenges to face in this anti-God culture, but God is big enough to preserve His people in the midst of it.
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